Not My Circus, Not My Monkeys!

You may have seen this phrase roaming around social media recently; it seems to be popping up all over the place. There's even a couple of pages by the name now - which is where this pic came from:-

As you can see, it's a Polish proverb, so I asked a Polish friend what it means, so I got the sense of it right (though, to be honest, it's pretty straightforward). She told me it's basically the same as 'none of my business'; though much more expressive. Which may tell you something about the English character.

Anyway, the phrase kind of stuck in my head and made me think about monkeys. I went to Kenya a couple of years back now, and when we were there, we saw plenty of monkeys. They weren't everywhere, but they were quite common, and there was one feature of monkeys that soon becomes obvious - monkeys do what they want to do. They're pretty much uncontrollable; and completely chaotic. So, what does that say about life? If the 'monkeys' are our circumstances, our feelings, everything that goes to make up our personal situations, does that mean that life is barely controlled chaos?

After all, even though circuses are made up of well rehearsed performances; they're still bright and colourful and explosively eye-catching, with what look like incredibly risky close calls sometimes. Certainly sounds like a much better description of life than business. Relationships should never be treated just as a business transaction. Ever. Relationships mean treating people as people, seeing them as interesting unpredictable individuals who can be worse than you fear and kinder than you dream - which will definitely be chaotic, and probably messy at times. But that's the difference between love and tolerance - which I also wrote about in this other post involving Polish people.

(And apart from the fact that God wants us to love everyone - not just tolerate them - there's always the fact that if you help others deal with their monkeys, they may just help you deal with yours...)

Love, Friendship, Trust

I went to a wedding a few days ago, which was wonderful, and the minister gave a talk on love. Unsurprising, really. And it wasn't anything I hadn't heard before; but it is worth thinking about.

He started with some quotes about love and marriage, including this one:-

Which is, apparently, very well known - though it's a bit of a surprise who said it. Not a guy well known for saying positive sounding things. And this is positive, because he's not only diagnosing a problem (unhappy marriages), he's also providing a solution (friendship). A straightforward, common sense view of how marriage should work - a lot of people go on about love being what marriage is all about, and they mean romance/feeling good; but it's a lot more than that.
He did actually talk about romance as well, but he was absolutely for the idea that love is more than that. Things like sharing and forgiving, that are vital parts of any relationship. So, I started thinking about my friends and how I could better love them, be a better friend.

And a few days later (yes, the wedding was during the week), the talk about church was about being friends with Jesus - or about Him being friends with us, as He said He would be. And the important point of the talk was that friendship involves trust. Both that it is a place where trust can grow, and that trust is needed for the relationship to grow. And what applies to our relationship with Him applies similarly to all our friendships...

In Memoriam!

A few days ago, it was D-Day; and the celebrations of the 70th anniversary at Normandy, where the Allied troops landed. I didn't realise that, because my historical knowledge is sadly not good - I remember when the peace treaty was signed, because the 11th day of the 11th month at 11a.m. is something that sticks in the memory, as it was intended. So, why do we commemorate D-Day, when ther were many other battles during WWII that were just as costly in terms of lives lost? The reason is that, although there were still several months to go, both sides knew that once the Allied forces had successfully invaded, it was just a matter of time before the war was over. And that is worth commemorating.

I discovered it was the 70th anniversary celebrations, because it was on T.V. all day, or at least between 9 and 5, when I was at work - I don't have a TV at home. And because I was at work (and the only one in), I didn't get to watch most of it, but I did see and hear some interesting things. Like a bit where they were going through the cemetery, and mentioned that it was something incredibly different for the time it was suggested - that all the fallen would be commemorated equally, in that the gravestones would all look exactly the same. No difference in size or shape, regardless of rank or family connections. Death is not always exactly a leveller; but, in this case, respect and gratitude made it so. And will continue to so do - the charter for the graveyard is that the grounds and headstones should be looked after with great care 'in perpetuity'.

I saw some of the church service, and an interview with Eddie Izzard. If it strikes you as strange that they should interview a comdian who is still remembered mainly for dressing in women's clothing (in the U.K. anyway), there was a reason. Apart from the reason that he knows a lot about history and the need for remembrance, and the idea that it makes it clear that everyone is equally affected by the way this turned out. Apart from that, there was another reason or two. The first was that he is currently embarking on a European tour, where he is doing his entire set in each native language, and Germany is in that list. And he'd done a gig (in English, French and German) in Normandy the day before. So, unity on an individual basis, as it were.
But the second reason, which is more important, is that he is donating the proceeds of this tour to charity; and in Germany, the charity is to support an artist. Who has an idea he's putting into action to create memorials for people who were kidnapped by the Nazis. He's looked up as many names and addresses as he can find, and he's making small metal balls engraved with their names, and placing them outside the houses where they lived. Which is important, because it reminds us that it wasn't just the soldiers who suffered and sacrificed in the struggle against the Nazis.

I missed the story about Bernard Jordan, which I didn't see until the next day. He couldn't get onto an official tour to Normandy organised by the British Legion, so he simply decided to sort it out himself. He left in the afternoon, and went and got on a ferry, without telling anyone in the care home where he was going. They started a missing person hunt for him, until someone contacted them saying they'd seen him in Normandy, and he was fine. Good job, Bernard.

Afghan Life

A few days ago I went to a TrinityMens event-which is exactly what it sounds like. An event put on by Trinity for men. It was a curry evening (yum), which sounds sort of typical of a men's event, but there was a bit more to it than that. There were actually 2 points, 3 if you count the simply getting-together-and-being-men aspect. It was to raise awareness and funds for A. S. E. T.- a charity which was set up by Dan Browne, who used to work for our church.

He gave a presentation about the work of A.S.E.T.-what they are doing, how they got to do it, and what they are looking to do in the future. He started as he always does apparently, with an open invitation to join him there, for however long; so, I'm repeating that offer. If you want to join him there, for however long, you're welcome-just contact the organisation. and then he explained how he got there. Just after 9/11, he was leading a prayer meeting, and he started calling out for God to send people to help in Afghanistan; and the upshot of that was that God sent him. He said he learned from that that it's always good to be aware that God may make you the answer to your prayers. So if you don't want to risk praying for them, you could always just send money-though actually I'm sure he'd prefer prayers, so he's hoping you want to take that risk.
Anyway, less than a year after that point, he was out there working for an N.G.O. in Kabul, which lasted for a year or so, before he felt he should go to the north of the country. And to do that, he needed to start his own organisation, so A.S.E.T. was born. He moved to Mazar-al-Sharif (a town who's name is 'grave of the holy man'-now there's ominous) and started whatever he could start. Which has grown from very little to actually quite a lot now. There's a lot to do, and the longer he's stayed, the more opportunities he's had to do more. The main thing they're hoping to work on now is well building, because Afghanistan is full of small villages who get their water from dirty sources, which is the main cause of all sorts of illnesses. Which is what we were intending to raise money for. Now as a well drilling rig costs approx £10000, you won't be at all surprised to learn that we didn't raise that much that evening, and nor were we intending to.

And that leads me on to the final point of the evening. Our fundraising idea is to canoe down the river Wye, or at least some of it. The amount they have in mind is 88 miles, which the idea is to do in two days. So, FAQ. Do you have to be able to canoe? Well, as long as you're confident you can keep going, you're unlikely to capsize, as they'll all be two man canoes. And there will be training days available. Do you have to be available for the training days? No, not if you can't make them. It will be a good time to build up relationships between all the people doing it, but it's not essential. Do you have to be a member of Trinity? Again no, as long as you're up for the challenge, and support what we're raising funds for. And, finally, do you have to be a man? Well, unsurprisingly, yes is the answer to this one. Or at least a male over the age of 14-if younger than 18, then an adult guardian must be taking part. And that's all, I think.
Oh, and if you want to go to Afghanistan for a couple of weeks with Dan, the next time with free spaces is in October, so plenty of time to plan...

A Letter To Benjamin

At church last week, we had another big promotional campaign for Compassion UK. There are a lot of people around who already support a child through them, but there are still people who want to do it-and as our Compassion advocates could tell you, there are always more children who need support. And the really great thing about how it is all set up is that supporting a child actually supports their whole family.

Anyway, it reminded me that it was about time I wrote to my sponsored child again-Benjamin Mutai is his name. I last got a letter from him in November, but he has heard from me since. His birthday is in December and then obviously there was Christmas, so he had a card from me both those times. I just hadn't sent a letter. And now I have. Last time he wrote, he was talking about his dreams. He wants to be a teacher. Apparently, all the children there know that education is their best hope, so they work really hard at school-he's particularly good at Maths and Science and enjoys them, so I wonder if he will go into teaching one of those subjects. At the moment, his letters are really short, as he's only 8. He basically gets interviewed about a subject, and gives quite short answers. And probably the fact that it has to be translated doesn't help with that.

And my replies aren't able to be much longer either, as we only have a small amount of space to write in. Which is fair enough, as he's still young-I wonder if there will be more space as he gets older. Anyway, I wrote my letter. He told me about his dreams, so I told him about one of mine. I told him I want to be a writer, and help encourage people through what I write. I did wonder how to tell him about this blog, but couldn't think how to do it. So I just told him that I wrote poems, I think. So now I'm waiting to see what he thinks of that.

If you want to support a child yourself, just follow the link here. I would recommend it if you can. And I would recommend it even if you don't think you can

A Political Post

Well, I've done a few things this week-for instance, my day off was quite busy-but mostly, I've been staying in. Which wasn't really planned, and was very relaxing. So, not having done that much, I thought I'd talk a bit about politics. Because a lot of other people have been talking about that recently, for one reason or another. And, also, because I saw this on a friend's facebook profile, and this pic on another's.


Which made me think a bit-and smirk. But mainly think. I definitely have opinions, as anyone who knows me well would agree, and am not afraid to share them. But I don't often do more than that. However, recently, I did. I signed a petition online a while ago, asking Dominic Mohan to take the bare boobs from The Sun. I don't often read any daily paper, but this is still something I feel to be important-so I signed the petition. And, as is often the case, didn't think much more of it, though I did read the emails they sent to keep me updated with the campaign. And recently, they asked us to support them by not shopping at certain shops for a week. They had selected several of The Sun's biggest advertisers, and  asked us not to shop there for one week, and to consider telling them why. Then they would contact them to ask them to consider stopping advertising with The Sun until Page 3 has been removed.
I had a slight advantage in doing it, in that I didn't read the message until Tuesday, so effectively 2 days of the week had already gone by-thankfully, I hadn't shopped at any of the shops that week. And when I looked at the list, there were only really 2 of the shops that I generally shopped at. However, the problem was that those were my main grocery shops, and both are within a few yards of my house. I actually live above one of them. So, the problem was not just remembering to get groceries from somewhere else; but also remembering not to just pop in when I felt like something on the offchance. Which I knew would be difficult, and I didn't know if I would manage it; but I knew that I could, if I tried. So I did. It made me think about what I bought, and to a certain extent why; and I definitely ended up buying less. And I only went to a takeaway once that I remember. So, I was reminded once again that I can do more than I often think I can-mainly if I actually think, rather than just going through life. And I wonder how much I (we) don't do simply because we don't think; and, more importantly, what we could do if/when we do think.

So, there you go-a political post that's not about politics-or at least not about voting. And to finish, I'll give you links to two other issues I feel strongly about:- marriage and peace. You may not feel strongly about either issue, and if not, you don't have to look; but I do, so I'm doing something. Only a little something, maybe, but doing something is better than doing nothing. At the very least, it keeps it in my mind.