Three Comedies - And A First

I've had a very bust weekend just gone, what with watching three films. All comedies, in case you were wondering. Which makes nine since I first got my unlimited card.

I was going to see 'The Inbetweeners 2' with a friend, but she could only manage Friday, and it wasn't on in Cheltenham then. But then I realised I would be working in Gloucester on Friday, so I just randomly checked to see what was on there; and it was on. At 7:45, which was fine, apart form the fact that I didn't know what to do in between then and finishing work at 4:30 - no pun intended. So, I decided to see 'The Boxtrolls' on my own. Yes, it is the first time in a while (about 20 years) since I watched a film at the cinema on my own, but I have done it before - so that's not the first. Nor is it going to see two films in one day, though that's also something I haven't done for a long time - and possibly should do more often, at least while I have the cineworld card anyway.

Incidentally, for those who haven't yet seen it, 'The Boxtrolls' is absolutely fantastic. Both exactly what you'd expect, and completely different at the same time. What I mean is that it's a brilliant children's film, with great animation, really funny with a touch of magic - well worth watching for those reasons alone. But the things you wouldn't necessarily expect beforehand are the plot, the characterisation, the surrealness, and the mild obsession with cheese. Which, you know, is definitely intriguing.

And 'The Inbetweeners' was just as funny, but in a completely different way. Which was probably a good thing. Anyway, it was a really good film, and I would also recommend you consider it - if you like that sort of thing. Which clearly I do. But 'The Boxtrolls' is good for everyone. And when I was on the bus on the way home, there were a whole bunch of students, and I couldn't help thinking about the film while hearing their somewhat random comments.
                                                      

But then we get to Saturday, and after a long day at work, I had an unplanned nap before heading out to a film premiere. Which was the first - I can definitely safely say I have never been to a film premiere before. I'm pretty sure I would have remembered. Just for those who weren't sure, it's called 'Broken Leg', and that's the promo poster. The reason I got to go is that one of the writers/producers has a sister (and brother in law) who lives in Prestbury so the U.K. premiere was at their house. So, the first film premiere I've ever been to (did I mention that?), and not only that, but the first film showing where I got to meet one of the actors - Sarah Sawyer, who plays Karla. She's over here for a year, studying at the Bristol Old Vic; past alumni of which include Patrick Stewart and Daniel Day Lewis. So, hopefully, this could be just the start of what she gets up to. And if you want to find out more about Broken Leg, you could check out the  facebook page- or watch the trailer below. It is a brilliant watch, by the way; a fun and funny family friendly film. Go track it down - you won't regret it. Really you won't.   

                                                       

Chilli Cocktails

I've had an interesting weekend - and a pretty busy one for a change. Usually Fridays and Saturdays are most likely to be free evenings for me, but this week I was out both. And at parties both of them too.

The first was a spectacular combination of events. It was a house warming and a birthday party, also combined with the annual chilli challenge. Which is pretty self explanatory, really. I'm not sure whether this is the third or fourth, but I do know I missed the last two, at least. So I wasn't going to miss it this time. Generally, it was, you know, just like any other party, except with the main attraction of the chillis in the middle of the evening:-
                                          

So, there we have the Master of Ceremonies and host letting everyone know what the rules are before the next chilli is consumed, and we had three five six rounds (I think). To be honest, it was all a bit random in my mind; but it finally got down to three of us, and then it was decided by a vote - probably because Dave didn't want to have the Scotch Bonnet. And after having one, I can see why. I did decide right after that I wouldn't - ever - do that again, but I'm not feeling so strongly now, even a couple of days later. By next year..? Probably want to push it as much as possible again.

So, apart from the minor discomfort of a couple of the chillis, it was just generally a really nice and relaxing evening with friends. Lots of friends. And a couple of people I didn't know who were just as friendly. And a very nice evening that was over far too soon. Probably a good thing though, as I had to work the next day. Which was fun. No, really, it was quite a nice day; even if I was a bit tired.
And then off to Gloucester for the second party in as many days. A much more colourful affair, this one, as it was Hawaiian themed.

I got there a bit late, but as I was still there before the birthday girl, I wasn't entirely sure which table was ours. Thankfully someone saw me with a present and asked if I was there for Helen's party, so after that everything worked out well. Bright colours, colourful cocktails (and food), great company, lots of laughter, a parrot and a flamingo. And I got given a very colourful garland (a lei?). What more could you want from a party? Alcohol? Well, we were in a cocktail lounge. Silliness? Well, with a mastering of completely British understatement, I have given very little idea of just how silly the whole evening was; just go with more. I haven't even tried to describe what happened to the parrot and the flamingo during the course of the evening, and I'm not sure I could.

So, after getting to bed at about 4:30, I didn't do much on Sunday except go to church in the evening - wearing my my lei. Because, after all, why not? Church is supposed to be a celebration, and when else would I get the opportunity to wear it. It was interesting to see just how many people didn't pay any attention to the fact I was wearing it, and I gave it to someone who will probably wear it a lot more often than I would. A great weekend, with some strong and colourful memories, and I'm pretty sure I've made some new friends...

What I Learned From Books 3: Love And Romance (And Maybe Sex)

One of the things that surprises at least some people is the fact that I read so many books which fit into the category of 'chick-lit'. Some people are fine with the idea, but there are some people who do seem to have difficulty fitting it into their mental picture of me, for some reason. I'm not sure why - when I say I read pretty much anything, I mean it. Of course there are some things I tend to prefer (and I don't often read technical manuals for fun), but as I read a couple of hundred books a year, there's plenty of space for pretty much everything in there...

So, for those slightly less aware, what is 'chick-lit' anyway? Isn't it just romance? Not exactly, but that's still pretty close. It's like the difference between 'rom-coms' and 'chick flicks'. The main difference in my opinion is humour; 'chick-lit' does cover more than just romance, but the thing that they all have in common (at least the ones I've read) is a robust sense of humour. 'Chick-lit' does cover more, but it's rare that romance doesn't feature at all.

So, having read definitely over a hundred of them, what have I learned about life - and relationships? Well, apart from the fact that romance still seems to be incredibly important to women in general (and that men in general seem to be pretty bad at it - not just me, then), there do seem to be a few recurring themes. Which eitther mean that the authors are pretty unimaginative, or real life really is this messy. I'm going for the second option, personally. These general themes are: life is difficult; relationships are difficult; marriage. Oh, and sex rears its many splendoured head time and time again. The first one is kind of obvious, really - if everything goes smoothly, there wouldn't be much of a story. Ever. And if anyone tries to say that's unrealistic, that life is easy; I would just gently suggest that you probably don't live in the same world as approximately 98% of the world's population, somehow. But that's really just background; it's the second one, that relationships are difficult that the majority of the stories are about.

And they get to be made difficult for two main reasons, really. All relationships suffer from breakdowns in communication; sometimes it seems that they are shaped by the secrets they keep - and share. And I do mean all relationships - with friends, work colleagues, and family members, as well as romantic partners. It almost seems that no-one really trusts anyone - but that can't possibly be true.
And romantic relationships also are affected by attraction. And sex. Surprisingly, sex isn't just had by people who fancy one another - and even when it is, attraction can and does fade. The thing that puzzles me, that I just can't get my head around, is how people can see sex as meaningless and at the same time so important that it's one of the main things (romantic type) relationships are centred on. Not the only one, I know; but it's so rare for it not to be there that I almost think it's implied to be the only vital thing. (Of course, these are all in books, obviously; so they don't relate at all to real life? Right?)

And marriage. You might be surprised that I mention that, as I'm talking about books that are basically talking about romance - so marriage is pretty much to be expected, right? Well, when I thought about it, it did come as a surprise to me. We're always being told/shown in the media, in books, that romance and relationships don't have to end in marriage; or even have it as an aim anymore. No-one would be surprised to hear that; yet in these particular books marriage is a big thing - and not just in the ones in a historical setting, either. It's far more common than not for marriage to be a major part of the plot - and that does come as a surprise.


And I think I'll leave you with this cartoon from xkcd which neatly covers the first three points...

Holiness And Boredom

A bit of an odd title, you may think - or you may be entirely happy with the idea that the two are linked. It is, I understand, quite a common idea that holiness is boring; or, at least, doing the things that lead to holiness are. I know where this idea sort of comes from, but I've never really understood how it developed. From what I know, the idea is all to do with the idea of asceticism being the ultimate 'good'; and, even for those of us who still live in the world, the idea of self-denial being what holiness is all about. After all, one fruit of the Spirit is self-control, isn't it?

But self-control does not mean self-denial; not at all. In the same way that the word temperance has changed meaning - it originally meant 'moderation', now it is used to mean 'abstinence' (particularly from alcohol - another idea that the Bible doesn't teach) - there has been an overreaction in the direction of caution. People didn't want to teach grace as being completely unlimited, because it felt like there would be no incentive to grow, to change. Or something like that.

                                                     

As we know, or at least think we do, that God loves us, but doesn't want us to stay how we are, we want to co-operate; and we also want some sort of reassurance that we are doing the right thing, that we are 'getting it right'. And it's not so very far from there to coming up with rules and regulations; so that we may see how well we are doing - and how well others aren't. And that becomes a cage; it is restrictive, painful, annoying, and yes, boring.

That's not what God wants. He wants to give us life - a full life, an abundant life. And life means growth. We can't be perfect straight away, just like we can't be fully grown immediately - but the idea is that we can and will grow into full maturity. However long that takes. And one thing we can be sure of is that it will take longer than we would like it to. Growing is something that takes a loong time sometimes, and it's not entirely in our control - but we can encourage it to grow the way we want to grow. By what we eat and how (much) we exercise, for example. And what we do spiritually has exactly the same effect. That's what holiness is all about in the end. And, essentially, it is the end...

Eating, With Friends

I've had another week off, and I was hoping to meet up with friends during the week. I was semi-successful in meeting this aim.

The week started off well with a thankyou BBQ at the new house of some friends. I was among those who helped them move in in some way, so I was invited to the BBQ they decided to do to thank people. I actually felt a bit embarrassed about it, cos it wasn't exactly any trouble for me to offer the little help I did, and I enjoyed spending some time with them. However, I always enjoy spending time with them, so I happily went along. And it was another great occasion - as all the BBQs I've been at this summer have been. The weather was great, the company better, and it was just a really nice way to relax. And definitely a good start to the week.
And the Monday was good in this way too. I managed to catch up with a friend I hadn't really seen for a while, except in passing. He also has a cineworld card, so I mentioned about going to the cinema. He was up for that, so I suggested grabbing something to eat - our cards give us discounts in certain places. So we ended up having something to eat. Eating is good.

And most of the rest of the week was pretty much quiet. I hardly saw anyone else all week - though I did leave the house a few times. It meant I had a lot of time for thinking and reflection; so I did. I thought and I reflected. I meditated on things. Several subjects, but so far have come to no conclusions. And I tried to write blog posts, but I only managed one. Why that was so difficult, I don't know. Maybe I needed the time to think, but I'm sure I would have enjoyed talking it through with people more.

And on the Saturday, I got the chance to talk to someone else. Another friend I haven't seen for so long that I can't actually remember when it last was. And I'm not going into the reasons why, but suffice to say we've tried to meet up several times this year and it just hadn't worked. Until yesterday. Which was wonderful. It was great to see him again, and also great to have an absolutely amazing long rambling conversation about all sorts of (very) random topics, both serious and silly. More silly than serious, I have to admit. We both like being silly - there's not enough silliness in life, I think. And it's important. Being able to be silly in company and having the chance to do it doesn't happen often enough. I can't speak for everyone, but I think most people would probable agree that they could do with more silliness in their lives. Wouldn't it be great to know that most relationships and meeting up with people would definitely involve seriousness and silliness - that wherever you go, whoever you meet, silliness is on the agenda. And that knowledge of silliness giving you the security to know that seriousness is possible...

Brilliant Bechdel!

Well, after seeing another film a few day ago ('Lucy'), it particularly made me think about the Bechdel Test. Named after Allison Bechdel, a cartoonist who came in at number 4 in Rolling Stone's recent list of best non-superhero cartoons; someone who was interested in feminism and gender politics - and good storytelling. And I thought it was about time I did a slightly intellectual post, after the last one.

So, now you know who Ms Bechdel is, what is her test? It was a piece from her book 'Dykes To Watch Out For', and it's a simple thing to see how female friendly a piece of entertainment is; mainly applied to films, it asks 3 questions. Is there more than one named female character? Do they speak to each other? About something other than a man? Which seems simple enough. But it's amazing how many films don't match up. By the way, by 'female friendly' I don't mean whether women might enjoy it; but rather, how positive an image of women does it promote.
                                                                 

Just think for a moment about the last couple of films you saw, and ask these questions. How does it stack up? The last couple of films I saw just about pass - I say 'just about' because both of them had minimal female characters. GOTG had 3 that I remember, and Lucy had 2 - unless you count her mum, who 'appears' once in a phone call. And these are films that actually pass. Quite a lot don't. The Avengers doesn't, for instance - although there are 3 strong named female characters (only one a superhero), they don't ever speak to each other, even when they share screen time.

But as this article acknowledges, the test isn't perfect - it has flaws. At least two that I can think of. One is that it's posssible to pass with literally a couple of lines of dialogue; and the other, just the opposite. That, as The Avengers shows, it is possible to have strong female characters and still fail. And there's also the point that dialogue doesn't reflect conversation - we generally are only shown what we need to see to follow the story. Which is why pretty much all rom-coms would probably fail. It would be a pretty bad rom-com where female characters didn't talk about the male character; though it could be possible.

However, I think the main point isn't that if a film fails this test, then it's not female friendly, not promoting a positive image of women; but rather, just that so many fail. It seems a pretty simple enough test; so, why do so many fail? What does that say about society? About us? And what can be done about it?

Comedies (With Tragedies)

I saw a couple of films at the cinema last week - it's about time I got round to doing that again. and they were both great.

I took my niece on Wednesday to see How To Train Your Dragon 2:-

and I went with some friends on Saturday to watch Guardians Of The Galaxy:-

both of which I recommend - they're great. They have a lot in common too - they're very colourful and silly, with lots of explosions and lots of unusual creatures. I mean, let's face it, dragons are pretty rare.
But they have other things in common too; a more serious side. Which wasn't really something you'd expect from films like this. Not that that's a bad thing; it definitely made them better films, in my opinion. They both showed the importance of family, and that family isn't just who you're born to; they both deal with loss, and love, and loyalty; they both have taking responsibility as part of growing (up); and they both show how important (good) relationships are. And that they aren't based on similarity or appearance - or, at least, don't have to be...