Chilli Cocktails

I've had an interesting weekend - and a pretty busy one for a change. Usually Fridays and Saturdays are most likely to be free evenings for me, but this week I was out both. And at parties both of them too.

The first was a spectacular combination of events. It was a house warming and a birthday party, also combined with the annual chilli challenge. Which is pretty self explanatory, really. I'm not sure whether this is the third or fourth, but I do know I missed the last two, at least. So I wasn't going to miss it this time. Generally, it was, you know, just like any other party, except with the main attraction of the chillis in the middle of the evening:-
                                          

So, there we have the Master of Ceremonies and host letting everyone know what the rules are before the next chilli is consumed, and we had three five six rounds (I think). To be honest, it was all a bit random in my mind; but it finally got down to three of us, and then it was decided by a vote - probably because Dave didn't want to have the Scotch Bonnet. And after having one, I can see why. I did decide right after that I wouldn't - ever - do that again, but I'm not feeling so strongly now, even a couple of days later. By next year..? Probably want to push it as much as possible again.

So, apart from the minor discomfort of a couple of the chillis, it was just generally a really nice and relaxing evening with friends. Lots of friends. And a couple of people I didn't know who were just as friendly. And a very nice evening that was over far too soon. Probably a good thing though, as I had to work the next day. Which was fun. No, really, it was quite a nice day; even if I was a bit tired.
And then off to Gloucester for the second party in as many days. A much more colourful affair, this one, as it was Hawaiian themed.

I got there a bit late, but as I was still there before the birthday girl, I wasn't entirely sure which table was ours. Thankfully someone saw me with a present and asked if I was there for Helen's party, so after that everything worked out well. Bright colours, colourful cocktails (and food), great company, lots of laughter, a parrot and a flamingo. And I got given a very colourful garland (a lei?). What more could you want from a party? Alcohol? Well, we were in a cocktail lounge. Silliness? Well, with a mastering of completely British understatement, I have given very little idea of just how silly the whole evening was; just go with more. I haven't even tried to describe what happened to the parrot and the flamingo during the course of the evening, and I'm not sure I could.

So, after getting to bed at about 4:30, I didn't do much on Sunday except go to church in the evening - wearing my my lei. Because, after all, why not? Church is supposed to be a celebration, and when else would I get the opportunity to wear it. It was interesting to see just how many people didn't pay any attention to the fact I was wearing it, and I gave it to someone who will probably wear it a lot more often than I would. A great weekend, with some strong and colourful memories, and I'm pretty sure I've made some new friends...

Comedies (With Tragedies)

I saw a couple of films at the cinema last week - it's about time I got round to doing that again. and they were both great.

I took my niece on Wednesday to see How To Train Your Dragon 2:-

and I went with some friends on Saturday to watch Guardians Of The Galaxy:-

both of which I recommend - they're great. They have a lot in common too - they're very colourful and silly, with lots of explosions and lots of unusual creatures. I mean, let's face it, dragons are pretty rare.
But they have other things in common too; a more serious side. Which wasn't really something you'd expect from films like this. Not that that's a bad thing; it definitely made them better films, in my opinion. They both showed the importance of family, and that family isn't just who you're born to; they both deal with loss, and love, and loyalty; they both have taking responsibility as part of growing (up); and they both show how important (good) relationships are. And that they aren't based on similarity or appearance - or, at least, don't have to be...

Not Really About Robin Williams

By this point, anyone reading this will know the sad news of the death of Robin Williams on Monday. You may have seen or heard it on the news, but you've definitely seen and heard it on the internet. All over the place. On blogs and all over social media everywhere.

And if you've seen that, then you must have seen the massive outpourings of grief that followed this news. The same sort of reaction that follows whenever someone famous dies (well, almost). The sort of reaction that I just don't understand. And will never understand. Just to be clear here, I know that this is my issue - I am somewhere on the autistic spectrum, and this is something I will always have difficulty processing. I just point that out to show that this is something that doesn't come naturally to me.

So, why does this happen? I think that the tribute paid to Robin by his daughter gives us a clue.She said that he was one of the kindest, most generous souls... and that the world is forever darker, less colourful and with less laughter now he is gone. This is the same for everyone, but some people do appear to shine more brightly than most. And that reflected light is how we are supposed to look at the world - so let's not leave it until it's too late; untill the light goes out.
I tried thinking about how I might feel when someone famous I really like might go at some point. Like my favourite musicians:-

For those of you who are unfamiliar with them, they are Alice Cooper, Dolly Parton and Steve Taylor, none of whom I am likely to meet in this lifetime - but they are all Christians, so it's not totally out of the question that I may well meet them in the next. So I have the hope that when they pass on from this world, that won't be the end of the story for them. So I would be sad, but not devastated. I would miss their music; but, again, I have the hope that they won't stop making music...

Meghan Tonjes Is Fat (Oh And Gorgeous, By The Way)

This is Meghan Tonjes (pronounced as spelt). If you don't know who she is, she's a singer/songwriter and vlogger from Los Angeles who posts a lot of videos on youtube. Some of her singing, and some of her talking about things. All sorts of things, but a lot about things to do with self image and self confidence. And she started a youtube channel dedicated to the same idea called Project Lifesize. Also, she's appeared on the Ellen DeGeneres show.

So, she's been quite busy over the last few years. And up until recently, I'd never heard of her. What I heard about first was the controversy over this photo, which she put up on her Instagram page as part of a series detailing her weight loss journey. Which got taken down. No warning, no explanation, except to say that someone had complained that it was 'offensive'. Whatever that meant - as I said, there was no explanation. I must admit I was puzzled, because I couldn't see anything particularly outrageous about it - it looks like hundreds of other photos that get put up every day on social media.

But she figured she knew why, and put up this video saying what she thought:-

And when I watched it, I thought 3 things. First, I thought she had a great smile, and was/is very pretty. Second, I thought that she's actually pretty smart as well. She has a problem, and she puts it across well without shouting or throwing a tantrum - which is getting quite rare on the internet these days. And, third, I noticed just a few musical instruments in the background. Reading the article again was when I registered that she is, as I said, a singer/songwriter, so I looked her up on youtube. Where this video comes from. And listened to a few of her songs - and then a few more. And watched some of her other F.A.T. (Frequently Asked Tonjes) videos, like this one. Well worth watching, all of them.

And, after that, I was pleased, annoyed, and challenged. Pleased because I'd found another good musician, annoyed that I hadn't found her before, and challenged because it made me wonder. How often do I behave like that? I didn't find that picture particularly outrageous, as I said, but how often do I respond to something that's essentially harmless as if it's really a problem. I don't know the answer, except to say 'too often'. And, also, how do I respond when someone else has a problem with me - do I respond as well as she did? Something to think about, I think - and keep thinking about. And working on changing. So I'm following her on youtube now. Not because I think she's attractive, though she is; but because she has a great voice, and she says things I could do with listening to.

By the way, Instagram restored her picture, and apologised. But they still didn't give an explanation, except to say that they 'sometimes get it wrong'. Hmm.

So, here's another few photos of her

 

Barbecue Season!

I recently read 'Treasure Island' for the first time, and saw one of the characters, the ship's cook, was called Barbecue (though he's better known by another name*), which made me think two things. One was to wonder what his cooking was like, and the other was to realise that I'd been to quite a few barbecues this year.

Now, obviously, Summer is the time to have barbecues if you're going to have them (though I know someone who will happily have them all year round), but I don't normally get to that many. I don't know why, if everyone's having them - and I don't know why I've managed to get to a few more this time.

The first ones I went to were in May, which I suppose isn't really Summer, but it was good weather, so why not? One was for a friend's birthday, and that was a really great occasion - a good time was had by all, inside as well as out. It was a real celebration, and I surprised myself by writing a poem about it.
And I got invited to another that month. It was at short notice, but I always appreciate being invited places, so I managed to get there. I was a bit nervous, because I didn't know how many people there I would know. But it actually turned out to be one of the best occasions I've been to for quite some time. There were only a few of us, but we all got on really well - lots of fun and laughter.

And I guess it was really that one that made me definitely decide to host one myself. I'm not good at hosting things, as I'm really bad at organising; but we have a barbecue, so I thought I'd give it a go. My housemate said it was all down to me, but I didn't realise until a couple of days before that he meant he wasn't going to be there. Which left me in a bit of a quandary, as I hadn't used a barbecue for years, and I'm a vegetarian, so I don't really know what cooking meat is like. However, I'd started it, so I meant to do it, so I figured I'd just have to figure something out on the day. I got in a few bits and pieces, like crisps and dips and some meat - and fuel, obviously - and waited to see who would turn up. I got a bit of a surprise when a friend I hadn't heard from in a while phoned me and came over, but that was good, as he then took over the barbecue - which left me free to welcome people and do drinks, as well as make a fruit salad. Which I thought would be easy enough, and it was. All in all, it kind of reminded me of my birthday party, which also worked out a lot better than I thought it might before, and had a surprising mix of people - who all got on really well. Maybe I just know a lot of very nice people.

And afterwards, I was left with a load of food - which was a problem, as most of it was meat. More than my housemate could eat, and I don't; but thankfully, another friend was having a barbecue the weekend after, so I passed a lot of it on to him. And that was the next barbecue I went to. Which was totally different to any of the others, mainly due to it being much bigger. Which meant I got to see other friends I hadn't seen for ages. And, surprisingly, ended up talking theology - which is something I don't get to do enough of, in my opinion. But something may have come out of that conversation which could change that. A bit, anyway.

Which brings me more or less up to date. There were a couple last weekend just gone, which were also good occasions where I spent time with friends I hadn't seen for a while - which definitely seems to be what barbecues are for. And at one of them I got a birthday invitation and an invitation to a prayer meeting; both of which I happily accepted, and am looking forward to. Friendships and God, what more could anyone want? And, if that's what barbecues have in store for me, I look forward to what might happen at the next ones, whenever they may be...

*By the way, Barbecue you may well know better as Long John Silver.

Two Birthdays To Baptisms

Two of my friends had their birthday last week - on the same day. But the celebrations weren't, so I got to celebrate two days in a row. Which was nice. And what was better was that both are friends I don't get to spend much time with, so that was a really good start to the week.

On the Sunday, there was an event called a Birthday Tea, which was just what it sounded like. A bunch of us converged on the house, and we had tea. And scones. Which were excellent - apparently James has won prizes for his scones several years in a row. It was a nice relaxed afternoon, with various friends from various places. It was nice to see them - and I'm sure Kirsteen felt the same. And the next day, another friend, who I hadn't seen for weeks at least, had his birthday. I had the day off then, which was unusual, and he had taken the day off, so we decided to go out for the day. We looked at several National Trust places, but decided to go to Slimbridge in the end. Which is a great place; the only drawback being that you pretty much have to drive to get there. But once you get there, it's well worth the drive. We wandered around looking at and feeding the flamingos and ducks and swans and pigeons and...well, you get the idea. And I got a pigeon to sit on my shoulder, which was a bit strange. There were new born flamingos to see, and we watched the otters being fed. All in all, we were there almost until closing time without realising. Definitely to be recommended at any time, though you won't always get to see baby flamingos. And then we went to the cinema to see '3 Days To Kill', which was definitely entertaining. I've been to the cinema more so far this year than I did all last year (as far as I remember), and all of the films have been worth watching.

The next couple of days I was in the Gloucester shop learning the new system, which was interesting, at least. I'm not sure what it will be like when we finally do go over to it, whenever that will be, but at least I know I can work it now. Tuesday evening I stayed in, cos I was exhausted, and Wednesday small group met at my house. And it was a very small group, as only 2 other people turned up. so we chatted for a while, and then spent the rest of the time praying about all the things we knew about that were going on with people we know.
Thursday evening was both happy and sad, as it was the goodbye meal for the Reads, who will be leaving the country probably forever. Which is good for them, and it was definitely a celebration in one sense, as it's been quite a journey for them to get to this point - but they will be missed. We will miss their presence, their smiles and laughter, and their caring natures. And we will miss seeing Adelaide grow up first hand. Still, at least we'll be able to keep in touch online; and we will. But, on the other hand, it was a really good evening all round.

I can't really remember anything much standing out over the next two days, but on the following Sunday there was another baptism service. Which is definitely a highlight of our church calendar; always a real celebration. Tim gave a sort talk about what baptism means, that it's an acknowledgement of grace:- that no-one is good enough, clean enough or British enough to earn His grace, but because God loves us He gives it anyway. This time I knew 5 of the people getting baptised, including someone I didn't know was until she got up to speak. She didn't tell anyone, and her fiance carried her change of clothes, so I didn't realise when I welcomed her at the door. But it was great to see her stand up and talk about what Jesus means to her. That was a great start to the people's stories, and I pretty much didn't stop smiling throughout, even when a couple of the stories brought tears to my eyes. As always, there were some wonderful stories, and the sight of a guy who was tall enough that he had to kneel down in the baptismal tank to fit in. But the best memory for me was the sight of a little girl, about 4-5, at the back wandering around - when each story finished and people clapped, she clapped along with them, even though she clearly didn't know why people were clapping. Another wonderful evening.

In Courage

I've been quite busy recently, as I've been working full time - and mainly on my own. As I haven't really stopped doing other things, I have ended up being really quite tired over this week or so. And when I get tired, I can get quite low and spending time with people is the last thing I want to do. Being an introvert, that makes me even more tired.

So, that was part of the reason I wasn't sure if I could make it to my life group/cluster meeting on Wednesday. However, I was pretty sure that God wanted me there, so I asked Him to help me get there; to give me His strength to get there. And I got there.

I can't really remember much of the evening, to be honest. We were discussing our third session on spiritual gifts, which was supposed to be on hospitality, prophecy and encouragement. As two of those are two of my main gifts, that would probably be a good reason to be there; but it didn't turn out that way.

First, we talked about hospitality, which is one I don't find comes to me naturally, and that took an interesting turn. Obviously, opening our homes up to invite people round, as people do for life group and small group each week is a vital part of it, but it was also suggested that just giving people time is being hospitable too. And someone said that it should be the case that if we really love each other, then any of us could phone or just turn up at someone's house because they need to talk. I don't know if that ever would happen, or even could; but wouldn't it be great if it did?

And then, the main part of the evening, which was a little unexpected. We talked a bit about encouragement, and then got on to the main part of the session, where we all got given a piece of paper with our names on it and passed it around for everyone to write something encouraging on it. Which took a little longer than had been anticipated, clearly. And that was presumably why I was there. It's always good to encourage people, and now we each have a permanent reminder of how some people see us.

The one of these I can remember clearly is that someone said I am incredibly kind hearted. I think I know who that is from, because there is one person who has said that to me before. But it's nice not only to know she thinks that, but she stands by saying it. I don't really remembe the rest, but that's fine - after all, the point is that I have them written down and I can reread it whenever I like. We all can.

Born To Burn!

It was Pentecost last weekend, for those who were unaware. And if you don't know what that means, it's what's sometimes called the birthday of the Church. It's described in the book of Acts as a day that started with a prayer meeting and finished with a church of over 3000. In the middle were some other things, such as God resting on people and empowering them to speak in other languages - and enough joy that some onlookers thought that they were drunk. How many church meetings that you know does that sound similar to?

I was at a meeting on Saturday - the day before Pentecost - which had something of that in it. My church had hired the Centaur building at the Racecourse and invited people from local churches (and some not so local) to celebrate with us. There were quite a few people there from various places, including some from Cornwall and Eastbourne - and a couple of thousand others. Not quite as impressive as 3000 joining from 0, but a great gathering nonetheless.

And God was definitely there with us. If there were any doubt, the fact that a girl who couldn't walk got out of her wheelchair during the worship - and hasn't needed it since - made that absolutely clear. Apparently she went to her church the day after, and really stunned pretty much everyone there by walking in. I hope and pray the effects of that grow and grow.

The talk was about how God wants to set us on fire with the Spirit - did you know that bishops' mitres were originally designed to look like flames in remembrance of the first Pentecost? The whole point being that they were supposed to represent what had already gone on inside - and was still going on. And this is something that God wants to do not just for bishops, or indeed, clergy of any kind; but each and every one of us. Always; every day.

What will happen when we allow Him to do just that? What could happen? We know He wants us to change the world; or, rather, He wants to change the world in and through us - so, what would He do in and through us when we let Him? And what will that look like?

There's been a lot of talk about evangelism recently; but, although that will clearly happen, I think it's almost certainly among the least of what He wants to do. I can think of at two things which are much, much bigger than that, in my opinion. The first of these is that He wants to teach us to love, and to grow all our relationships through this. After all, love is what He said would mark us out among people - what others will notice.

And the second is to give us dreams and visions; to challenge our imagination and our faith. If He wants to change the world, He could send us anywhere and empower us to start anything. That's why He said 'the wind blows where it will, and you do not know where it comes from or where it is going; so it is with people born of the Spirit'. Where will you go?

Blood In My Alcohol Stream

Well, alcohol! Strong drink can arouse strong passions! From CAMRA to (not) drinking and driving campaigns to general health, all sorts of people have all sorts of opinions about what is good or (generally) bad about alcohol.

And just as much strength of opinion in Christian circles. Mainly in America, it seems, but in other places too strong opinions can be found on the subject. A lot of them insisting that Christians should be teetotal, even to the extent of arguing that Jesus didn't create wine at the wedding in Cana. Which seems ridiculous, because it actually says that the steward called the bridegroom over and said 'everyone else serves the best wine first, and when the guests have had a lot to drink, bring out the cheaper wine; but you have saved the best for last', so, clearly, he knew that it was wine and good wine at that. Guests who had been drinking and had every expectation of continuing to do so would not have been happy to have grape juice.

So, what does the Bible actually say about drinking? Quite a lot, actually - there are over 200 references to wine in the NIV, for instance. A lot of them are actually about offering wine as sacrifices; so, the one thing you can take away from that is that God was quite happy to accept wine. There are also some commands not to drink when the Israelites are in the Tent of Meeting, and the description of the Nazirite vows - which did demand total abstention. Which clearly implies that, in general, the Israelites were allowed to drink. Sounds good to me.

It has been pointed out that there are stories of unsavoury behaviour connected to wine, usually involving nudity; but, in all these cases, it is actually due to drunkenness. One of the most striking stories involving wine is of a king who gets given some wine that hasn't matured properly, which tastes awful; so he has the containers marked 'poison'. And leaves them alone. A few years later, he gets bored with one of his wives, so she decides to commit suicide and finds the 'poison'. Which obviously doesn't kill her, but the wine has matured by now, and she regains her joie de vivre and he decides he likes her again. One of those stories that really makes you wonder why it's in the Bible; but the thing that stood out to me was that God seems to like wine more than some people do.

I'll just finish by pointing out that Ps 104, which is basically one of thanks and praise acknowledges God giving 'wine that gladdens the heart' (v15) among other things that He is worth being thanked and praised for. He made it, He likes it, so let's raise a glass.

A Weekday Wedding!

A few days ago, I went to a wedding. Which was lovely - particularly so as I didn't know the couple that well. Which may sound strange, so let me explain. The lovely couple, Bryn and Rhiannon, joined my cluster about the same time I did, back in September, so most of us don't know them that well yet. When they invited the whole cluster to the wedding, I felt honoured - I felt that they were saying that they feel like this cluster is where they want to be, they do want us to be part of their lives, to celebrate with them; and I looked forward to the wedding.

So, anyway, the big day came and I got to the church early. Pretty much the only time I've got there that early; before most people I know; though the church was still pretty full. I saw Bryn on the way in, and he was clearly pleased to see me, which was nice. I chatted at the back for a few minutes, and then we all sat down before the service started. It was a lovely service, with some really nice hymns. 'How Great Thou Art', 'Love Divine, All Loves Excelling' and 'Be Thou My Vision' are just really great songs, as well as powerful pieces of worship - I think we should use hymns more often. And the talk was done by a friend of theirs, who said some good things about love and relationship, while talking specifically about and to them. We learned a few interesting things about them; for instance, the fact that Rhiannon is good at organising social things. We'll remember that.

Then we went outside, to greet the new Mr and Mrs Naylor, and throw confetti. And a few people took photos, though most of them were taken at the reception venue. Then we went our separate ways, as those of us who knew them well went to the reception; and some others of us went into town to grab something to eat. Which was also nice. It was good to continue the celebration as it were; and to get to know Sarah and Anna a bit better in a relaxed way. In a while, Ian and then Al joined us, and we went to a pub for a drink, before finally drifting along to the reception venue. It's amazing how quickly time can pass when you're enjoying yourselves - it was a really great day all the way through.

We got along to the venue in the evening, and congratulated the (very) happy couple, and then joined them in celebrating. Drinking, dancing, chatting and conjuring - which was a bit unexpected. All in all, a great day was had by all; certainly a day to remember. And I'll say that we hope this day marks the start of a great life ahead, and we look forward to getting to know them both better and celebrating other things in the future. To Bryn and Rhiannon...

Turning Thirty (Oh Alright, Forty)

So, after writing about my birthday party (two posts ago), I figured I should tell you about how I spent the following week-the one just gone. And I hope more people read it than the same post from this time last year, which is still my least viewed post. So far.

The party finished fairly late (or early, depending on how you look at it), but I was still quite awake; so I went online for a bit, and eventually got to bed about 4 in the morning. Thankfully, the next day was the first day of a week off, so I spent the day relaxing. I'm pretty sure I didn't see any more of the morning, and didn't do much in the afternoon. Except work on a blog post about my sponsored child, Benjamin. Which I didn't finish. I could have gone to a party in the evening, but frankly the thought of going somewhere where there were a couple hundred people didn't really appeal. However, relaxing did-so that's what I did.

Sunday was pretty much as normal, because I don't generally do much on Sundays anyway. Except go to church in the evening. It was a bit different, because a friend was celebrating her birthday, which actually was on that day. Not the same birthday either-she has a fair few years to go before getting here. So that meant fun and frolics at the pub, and, well, cake. Another friend had made her a cake, which was very nice. Cake is always nice.

On Monday, I didn't do much. Again. Except finish one blog post, and start another about the party. Oh, and join Twitter. Which is fun. I mean, that was the reason I got a smartphone in the first place-because God wanted me to join it. If anyone wants to follow me, you can find me at @neilfix.
But Tuesday was much more energetic. I actually got up in the morning. Without trying. I wasn't expecting that. I was meeting up with the friend who'd come down from Leeds for the party. He was staying with friends for a few days, and so we got to spend the day together. Well, the afternoon, anyway. Which involved wandering around town, reading books in Waterstones, and praying in a pub. Well, what else would one do in a pub? I was feeling a bit stressed due to a relationship that is not going well at the moment that I can't do anything about, except wait and pray. So we did that. And then in the evening, I went along to help with Alpha again. And got given a card, which I wasn't expecting.

Wednesday, I didn't leave the house all day, which I was glad about, as the weather was horrible-but that didn't mean it wasn't busy. People came to me. First, my mum, at about lunchtime. She stayed for a few hours, and appreciated the cards and presents with me. I got all sorts of things; some of which were sort of expected, like socks-I pretty much always get socks. Usually brightly coloured ones. Or black ones. Or a mix of the two. So that was nice. And then she left, in time for me to get ready for small group, which was happening at my house. I hadn't planned that specifically, but it was nice. I was hoping that some of the alcohol left over from Friday would be consumed; but, because the weather was so bad, everyone drove. So I'll have to come up with something else to get rid of it. I may even have to drink most of it myself. When  we were praying at the end, someone prayed for me; praying that God would bless this year, and bring to fruition all the things I want from the year. I have a suspicion He wants more than that, and I definitely want to pray that what He wants happens, rather than what I want. Which, often, is actually quite limited.

Thursday and Friday, nothing much happened, except emotionally. Thursday, I didn't have any plans until the evening, which was definitely a good thing. I spent most of the afternoon praying about this relationship which has broken down. Which was quite painful. It gets that way at times. I went to Hungry in the evening, and I felt more or less fine when I got there; but at one point, there was a offer for people who felt exhausted for any reason to come up to the front, and I was then being ministered to for the rest of the evening. Friday I had been planning to visit a friend in Gloucester, but that didn't happen; so I got to recover from Thursday. Which I needed, as Saturday was another busy day.

My sister and my niece came over about lunchtime, and handed over my card and presents. Which were books that weren't books. My niece played the piano for a bit, which sounded nice. Which was amazing, when my sister mentioned she'd never played before. But before she complained too much, we went out for lunch. Sort of. We went to Bela Luna, which is an ice cream parlour that also does crepes and waffles. Thumbs up all round-I definitely recommend it. The assistants were all very friendly and happy to offer us free samples of some of their weird ice cream flavours-especially one girl, who was incredibly bubbly, and I had the weird feeling I'd met her before. But, frustratingly, I couldn't place her-if I even was correct in that.
Neil met us there, and then we all went back to my house, where the adults all tried our best to ignore my niece-as much as it's possible to ignore a very loud, incredibly energetic nine year old. Not much, is the answer to that. Then they left, and me and Neil hd some quiet to pray again, as we'd prayed on tuesday. But this time we had more time to listen and wait for God. Neil said he felt that God wanted to do some healing in ih of us separately at the moment, which is entirely possible. I just don't know what God is doing, which makes it difficult to co-operate with Him.

And then I went round out to tea at another friend's. Well, two of them, actually. We had a great conversation that started off talking about vision, and then moved onto watching funny videos on youtube. Just what I needed at that point. And Sunday night was pretty good, too. After church, I met our newest cluster member, Adelaide Read, who was 10 days old at that point. We actually have another new member now; name and weight currently unknown to me. And then I went out to meet up with another friend who I hadn't seen for a while, and it turned out she'd invited a few others. And a great time was had by all. Lots of laughter, and the posssibility of seeing her in a comedy gig in Bristol at the weekend...

Party Time!

A few days ago, I had a party for my 40th birthday. I haven't actually had the birthday yet, that's in a couple of days time, as I write this; but, I was persuaded that I definitely should have a party this year. I don't generally make a big deal of my birthday, cos I'm not hugely keen on celebrating, or on large groups; and I'm really bad at organising. So I don't bother, usually, apart from taking time off work. Because I can.

Back in the summer, a couple of friends said they would organise a party, but that didn't end up happening; so I ended up doing it myself. A conversation with someone at a friend's birthday celebration decided the day, so then I just had to let people know. Which you would think was easy, what with Facebook events and suchlike; but, apart from the fact that hardly anyone actually pays attention to those, I know quite a few others who aren't on Facebook. I know, incredible, isn't it?

But, somehow or other, it all got pulled together, with the help of several friends; and turned out brilliantly. There were quite a few (nice) surprises. Like, for example, I got home from work on the day to discover my housemate had tidied the house and set things out ready-and got balloons and a banner saying 'Happy Birthday'. And things only got better from there on. A whole bunch of friends came, several who weren't sure whether they would be able to make it. Which was nice. And some came from literally hundreds of miles-including my best friend, who lives in Leeds. He didn't think he'd be able to afford it, and, indeed, wouldn't have been able to, if it wasn't for the fact that another couple, mutual friends, offered to pay his coach fare, and put him up for a few days. And none of them told me; so that was a massive surprise when I went to the door.
And the last outstanding moment was when the cake came in. Another friend, who's fond of baking, offered to make me a cake; but I wasn't expecting one like the one that appeared. It was huge; basically a black Forest gateau with raspberries instead of cherries. And she got candles, and brought it in to everyone singing 'Happy Birthday'. I'm not saying I had tears in my eyes, but I wouldn't like to swear definitely that I didn't.

Well, after that, it was always going to be a really great evening; and, as far as I can tell, everyone enjoyed themselves. I certainly did, and I've only had positive comments from people who were there. I was a little concerned about making sure I got to speak with everyone, but I think I managed it. And I've still got my actual birthday to look forward to. Which among other things will be when I get around to opening all my cards. Not so much presents-although they were presented in abundance, most of them seemed to be alcohol-what do my friends think of me? But there will be people round again that evening, as my small group is on that evening, so it's not going to finish until we've made a reasonable dent in the amount of alcohol left. Because I don't really want to drink it all by myself-honest.

So, a lovely evening all over-and at least one person has said I should do it again next year. I'm not convinced, but I've got plenty of time to work on that...

A Week Of Celebrations

Last week, I worked out I was out 7 out of 9 evenings. Which being as I'm an extreme introvert, probably wasn't the best decision I could have made, and it was exhausting. But it was also a great week, and I'm not sure I would have done anything differently if I could redo it.

It all started with a flatwarming party on the 18th (also, coincidentally, my mum's birthday) for someone in my cluster. She's actually been there a few months-I know because I helped her move in (a bit)-but this is the first chance she's had to relax since, as she was in 'The Sound Of Music' in December. Anyway, that going on, someone figured it might be a nice idea if some of us got together before and went out for a meal. So we did. We went to Bar and Wok, which I would definitely recommend. A nice time was had by all, and I discovered I'm not as bad at using chopsticks as I vaguely remember being. And then we went to the flat warming, which was fun. Spending time with people I hadn't seen for a while, lots of catching up and nonsense conversations; and, a bit later, some more serious conversations. With lots of laughter throughout. A most successful evening, I feel.
And then, the next day started way too early for my liking really. As I work Saturdays, I generally like to take it easy Sunday mornings; but, some friends of mine were having their daughter dedicated that morning, so I went along. I always like going to those services, especially as I get to catch up with friends I otherwise don't see for ages at a time. It's the first time I've seen Phoebe Cowe, who I have to say looks very like her mum, and appears quite good natured-though you'd have to ask her parents for their take on matters, being as they're the ones who are currently missing a lot of sleep.

Tuesday, my usual day off, was the next day I did something. As I couldn't meet up with my mum any earlier, we spent the day together. Which was nice. A bit odd, in one respect, though, as we ended up getting my birthday present, even though mine isn't for another couple of weeks. We also sorted out meeting up again with my sister and family for a meal, and talked about having a family photo done. Oh, and for those of you who are wondering, I did get her a present as well.

Wednesday evening was cluster, and it was the second session on 'How Do I Make My Life Count'. It was about belonging and community. Which is not just important, but basically vital. It's almost impossible to grow as a person withour people around you to support you and encourage you. And, you know, just in case I haven't mentioned it before, I know my cluster is definitely a place where that happens. And I know I'm not the only one who feels that way. But I'm definitely becoming more open through being part of it; and building relationships, both old and new. Which is definitely a good thing and a God thing.

Thursday evening I didn't go out anywhere, not even Street Teams-I don't do that every week now. Which was probably a good thing, but then Friday was a friend's birthday celebration, so I was out again. It had a bit of a strange start, as we were supposed to meet in a particular pub at 8, so I figured I'd get there a little after that. I arrived at 8:15, and I was the second one there. And the other one wasn't the 'host', as it were. In fact, she didn't turn up for quite some time after; quite a crowd had gathered before she turned up. Never mind, though, she got there, and a good time was had by everyone. Catching up with people I hadn't seen for a while, and getting to know some people a bit better. Lots of chat and laughter went on until I was surprised to find it was almost midnight-and as I had to be at work at 9 the next morning, I really thought it was about time I got home. So I walked home with a friend who lives near me, as of a couple of weeks ago; which was nice. And proably didn't go straight to bed and sleep, I can't really remember, but it doesn't seem likely.

That was 5 of the 7, and the following weekend was another two. But to be honest, I don't really remember those two evenings, as I was far too tired to really focus. Bit of a shame, but there it is-I really need to remember that I am an introvert, and therefore don't deal well with large groups without time to recharge. Led to some interesting times of prayer, though. Oh, and one other thing that deserves a mention is that a relationship with a friend that almost completely broke down last year is well on the way to being restored, and this week was good for that too.

Communions

I may have mentioned that church a couple of days ago was a communion service, but I didn't mention that I started thinking about communions and how some of them have affected me. This was partly because this was a topic of conversation at New Year; and partly because it's not something we do all that often at my church, so when we do, I kind of notice.

So, communions I have known (or, at least remember). Starting with the most recent-the first of this new year. What I remember feeling most about this one was that it seemed to be a welcome. Hugs and handshakes going on all over. As well as the service itself being welcoming, due to the fact that there were loads of people there I hadn't seen for a while; it felt like a welcome to me due to the fact that the last time I had been at church (Christmas Eve) was also a communion service, and so, it felt like a continuation in a way, linking to last year. Maybe just for me, but that is what it felt like. So, not something new, but the next step to the next stage of whatever God has for me, here and there.

So, the last one I went to, at midnight Christmas Eve, stood out for slightly different reasons. Of course, there were people there I hadn't seen for a while, some of them not at the new year service; but that's not what I remember most about it. What stands out about the actual communion is the fact that I got given a large piece of bread. Let me explain. One communion I will always remember was one from a youth camp somewhere somewhen which was also done with bread that we could break off ourselves; and I remember clearly noticing that there was plenty of bread left over. God spoke to me about that, saying 2 things: one was that there is always plenty of him to go around; and, the other thing was a warning, almost, just pointing out that the reason there was so much bread left over was because people hadn't taken it; so how often do we not get as much of/from Him than we need because we don't do what we need to? To get back to Christmas, the reason this stood out was that it felt like God was just pointing out that He was giving Himself to me generously. Because it was Christmas? Because it was near the end of the year? Or just because He's God, and He likes doing things like that? It doesn't really matter, just that it did bring that to mind for me.

Another one I remember clearly is the one from last year's Good Friday service. I always like the good Friday services, which are always quiet and meditative; and completely different every year. This year, it was based around an art exhibition, so there were paintings along the walls; and, as part of it, we were directed to look around at them. I say 'directed', but that isn't quite accurate, one of the features of these services is that they are designed to be as free as possible, with a minimum of liturgy. However, the reason this one stands out in my memory is that it was the first time I have helped with the communion itself. I felt it to be a real privilege; the whole thing felt different to me.

And the other one which will stick in my mind for a while, for completely different reasons is one where I didn't take part in the communion at all. Because I was unable to, due to crying so much. To be honest, I'm not exactly sure why I was crying; but, at the time, I was going through a very stressful time I think I just needed to let go. I started crying at some point during the worship, and continued until some point after the communion had finished; and I just couldn't move. However, I definitely don't feel that I missed out-God was with me in and through that. Communion is one point that He asks us to meet with Him; but He doesn't want us to be religious about it - He isn't.

Christmas Eve To Boxing Day

Christmas Eve was a long day, because I was working in the morning; so I was there from 9. I did wonder if it would be worth opening, but we did take about double what we took on the Monday. However, it was still quiet enough that I managed to watch a lot of T.V. clearly enough to remember. I saw most of 'The 'Gruffalo', and a children's version of  'A Christmas Carol' (with a robot called Robert), which ended in a huge party-so that's two this year. I also watched a bit of the Jim Carrey version, which is strange, because it's live action, but it looks kind of animated.
Anyway, I finished there about 1, and then went into town to finish my Christmas shopping. Hardly surprising, as I'm a bloke, and we're not allowed to be that organised. Actually, it wasn't that difficult, as I'd bought most stuff already; I just needed to buy a couple of other things for most people, and a lot of things for my niece. And, with the exception of my niece, I got most of the things in one shop. So, after that, I had a quick drink in Costa (where there appeared to be another new member of staff), and then went home. Where I then spent some time writing this post before going on facebook for a bit. And then I went to church, for the midnight Communion service. Which is one of my favourite services in the year. I like it because it's quiet and because it leads into Christmas, but mainly because of the atmosphere. It's a more thoughtful (and thought provoking) service than the standard ones. My absolute favourite is whatever happens on Good Friday, which is different every year, but that's also more thought provoking than normal. It's also good cos I get to see people I don't see that often, as people who used to live here come up to visit family. So, after that finished, I got to wish several people 'Happy Christmas' pretty much right at the beginning of the day. Which was nice. 

And so I got up the next morning ready to celebrate Wednesday *CHRISTMAS*!!! Which I think is worth celebrating. but my housemate had gone off to his parents, so there was no-one around-until my sister came to pick me up. But what with all the other things I had to do to get ready, I hadn't managed to wrap the presents. So my sister offered to do most of them, while I wrapped hers. Which took us about the same time. And then we went off to see the rest of the family at my mum's-and then all decamped to my sister's. Don't ask, because I don't know. I was told not to ask, so I didn't. And then we started the big event of the day, unwrapping presents. Or at least my niece did, and the rest of us caught up in a bit. A few hours went by, during which I saw some of 'Tangled', a splendid film (which reminded me of a couple of people) and I prayed a bit in the kitchen. Just because that was the only empty room at the time. And when my sister's bloke got home from work, we had food. Which was nice. And relaxed for a bit, before going back to my mum's (well, me and her, anyway); where I had more presents to unwrap. I was hoping for books and socks. I didn't really get many books for Christmas, but I did get gift cards; so there may well be more books arriving in my house before too long. And that took us to a surprisingly late time of evening; so that was pretty much it fo the day.

And thenwe get to St Stephen's Day. I know nothing about him, except when his feast day is-the day after Christmas. Which was a lazy day, because I could be. I got up late and didn't do anything much until the evening, when we went round to visit friends' of my mum, who always have a little something on this day. Which was brilliant as always. Nice and relaxing and fun and great company as ever. And plenty of food. More presents were exchanged, and I got another gift card; so I will definitely be buying something soon, though it may not be books. Who knows?

So, that was my Christmas time. And on the Friday, before going home, I managed to write a poem...

Monday To Mentoring To (More) Mulled Wine

And so we now get to Mon 16th, when I went to a friend's house to watch 'Scrooged' on their 92" screen. Very nice; so they make the most of it by having film nights while it is dark-not so much point in the Summer. Anyway, one of my personal Xmas traditions is to read or watch a version of 'A Christmas Carol' at some point in December. And that was one I hadn't seen before. Now I have; and I have to say it's worth it. Very funny, and it does a great job at doing the story differently. I'd definitely be up for watching it again.

Tuesday was so quiet I can't remember much happening. Apart from telephone conversations with friends I don't see that often-so two conversations kept me on the phone for almost four hours. Seriously. But on the other hand, I probably won't talk to them again for weeks, at least.

Wenesday, on the other hand, was very busy. After work (you know, that thing I go to every now and then), I met up with a friend who I'm kind of mentoring. I say 'kind of', as he doesn't really need to get my advice, so much as the opportunity to talk about what he's up to and turn it over himself. He's working as a Chaplain's Assistant at the University, and doing a Master's alongside it. But what he mostly talked about was the stuff he's doing in the Uni. His relationships with students, and churches; what good things he's been seeing; and what issues and opportunites he sees ahead. I think he has a very good idea of what God is doing in him and through him, and how to make the most of that. Which is brilliant.
And then, after that, I went home and got changed in time to go out again. For my cluster Christmas meal. There were quite a few of us, including a couple who aren't technically part of the cluster-yet. Nineteen in total. Which meant we couldn't all sit together, so there was a fair bit of wandering about; as well as a lot of noise and laughter. And at the end, we got a photo taken of the lot of us-don't we look wonderful.

On Thursday, I went out with Street Teams for the last time this year. It's always a bit strange going out when late night shopping is on, because it kind of feels a bit like we're in the way. I just have to think that we're there whatever; we're not doing it to show off in any way. We go out because people need help and because we can. I had a couple of interesting conversations with a couple who have both come off drugs recently and have no idea of going back-but that's the only point the conversations had in common. One was saying how he couldn't think how he could get a job, and his girlfriend was focussed on the fact that she had hope of something different, a different future. She was really looking forward to Christmas for the first time in years, and also her appointment with a counsellor in January. She said that, for her, drugs were about hiding, and she wasn't going to hide any more.

Friday nothing memorable happened (you know, cos I can't remember it), but Saturday I went to a party. Again with people I hadn't seen for a while-it seems as if that's something of a theme this month. Which is a good thing. Now I just have to keep in touch a bit better as we go into a new year.
And, finally, Sunday. Another party, sort of. It was actually more of a gathering of people, mainly from cluster before we all went to church for the carol service. But it was good fun, and I had the opportunity to have more mulled wine. And then the carol service itself; which was actually really beautiful. And after, I got the chance to catch up with a few people I hadn't seen for a while, which is always good-and plans were amde for the end of the week, maybe.

Sort-of Social Diary

And so, following on from my last post, I'll start telling you a few of the things I've been enjoying this December...

Starting on the 6th, which was a day earlier than I was expecting. The 7th was, unfortunately, triple booked, so I had to move one thing to the Friday; which was going to see friends at their house. Which was nice. Bit of a shame that one of them was ill, and couldn't really join us, but still a nice, relaxing evening was had by the two of us who remained. I was kind of half expecting to see the kids, but they were in bed; so we just had a bit of a random conversation and watched amusing T.V., and made fun of the cat. Because what else are cats for?
And then on the Saturday, I did one of the other things I'd agreed to do that evening-go to the theatre. It was easy to choose, because of the whole having paid for the ticket thing. It was the Jacob's Well performance of the year, with the profits once again going to charity-Hope for Justice this year. This year, the production was 'The Sound of Music', and it was brilliant. I've never seen the film, and I really enjoyed it-I'll have to get around to seeing it, so I can see how different it was. The main thing I was surprised by was how many of the songs I actually knew quite well; but, also, how sad the tone of the whole play was. Apparently, that was definitely down to the director; so I look forward to seeing the film at some point.
And then, on Sunday, I didn't go to church-at least not mine. I went to a event for people from any church in the local area, which is held once a month called Seek His Face. Again, as has been the case before, I wasn't sure whether I wanted to be there, but felt that I should be; so I went. And was glad I did. On the way there, I was praying about something (well, sort of complaining, really)-something that I don't know how it's going to turn out or what to do about. And when I got there, that didn't seem to matter anymore. It definitely isn't sorted, and won't be for the forseeable future; but I spent some time with God, where He wanted me to be, and that's what mattered. The other thing I remember about the evening was the music. Often, when worship music is played, it sounds sort of like AOR, but this sounded different. More like folk/country/blues singer/songwriter sort of sound. Certainly not like anything else I've heard recently. And I really liked it.

Monday was quite quiet, with nothing in the evening, but Tuesday was quite different. It was my day off, as usual, but instead of me basically spending the day on my own until Alpha in the evening, I was with people from early afternoon. Because one of the Element evenings had been cancelled, that was on then, but there isn't so much to do for that, so the chefs had decided to hang around and play games; and I joined them. Which was great fun, with chocolate and music and Monty Python, followed by Cluedo. And then, in the evening, I went off to the cinema to meet a few friends to see 'Frozen'. And thoroughly enjoyed it, by the way. It's well worth seeing.

Wednesday was my cluster as usual, and we were meeting at the new house of one of the couples. And someone new joined the cluster. And it was very Christmassy, what with their tree being up, and 5 boxes of mince pies to be consumed. Other than that, it was a pretty normal cluster evening. Which is to say it was fiun and interesting. We ended by splitting into smaller groups and saying positive things to each other. True ones, obviously. Which was interesting as well as encouraging. And then some of us went to the pub at the end of my road, which is already a firm favourite. And even better, when we got there, I saw a couple of friends I hadn't seen for ages-months in one case. So we caught up a bit, and talked about meeting up soon.
Thursday likewise was pretty normal. I decided not to go out with Street Teams, though I definitely intended to the week after. But I did go to Hungry for God.
Friday was a surprisingly quiet evening. I did have the chance to go and see Riding Lights Theatre Company, but decided I was too tired, and actually quite fancied a night in. And then I was invited out to the pub, and thought about going. I didn't go, and later discovered it was someone's birthday celebration. Oh well, never mind-I probably needed the rest.

Saturday evening was quite busy, in contrast, so that was probably a good thing. I met up with one of the friends I saw on Wednesday in the early evening, and later on, I went to 'Christmas Drinks' at another friend's. It was good to see Rose, and catch up, as I hadn't seen her properly for literally months. It looks like I may be seeing quite a bit more of her in the future, as she may well join my cluster. Which will be nice, I think. And 'Christmas Drinks' was also good, catching up with a few other people I hadn't seen for a while-and mixing mulled wine with Archer's. Very nice.
And on Sunday, the talk at church was part of a series called 'A Christmas Carol'. It was based on 'Hark, The Herald Angels Sing', and it was about several things. It was about the fact that when God came, He came as the lowest of the low, only attended by His earthly family; it was about how the first people the news was proclaimed to were the lowest of the low, that right from the start, He was about inclusion; it was about the fact that He is a King worthy of beong proclaimed by a crowd of angels; and it was about the fact that when God speaks, we should respond in some way-different things said requiring different responses.

Mainly Men

So, after a week off, how did I fare back into the real world, as it were? You know, with schedules and things. Well, actually surprisingly well. Quite often I don't feel rested after time off, and could do with another couple of days, but this time I felt great. I was actually feeling ready for work and quite well enough rested this time, which surprised me. But obviously nothing much had changed in the world of work, but I had an unexpected theme arising in the evenings.

Monday evening was an event put on by the men's ministry at church-such as it is. Which at the moment isn't really anything. The reason for this is that the guy who used to lead it has now gone off to train to be a vicar, and the leaders decided they wouldn't do anything straight away; but would ask the men what they wanted out of the ministry. Which is what the meeting was all about really. First, we talked about what it means to be a man, and then a Godly man; and then we were talking about what sort of things we wanted to have which would help us become more like that. A bit, anyway. That came right at the end-deliberately. They wanted us to think about what we thought we wanted to be/should be, before anything else. With that in mind, they wanted us to go away and think about what we thought would help us achieve that and email them. Which reminds me-I still have to do that.

Tuesday was Alpha as usual. Nothing out of the ordinary there. But Wednesday was small group, and instead of the usual small group, we had split into men and women. I was in the men's group, if anyone is unsure. Apart from having 'man snacks' instead of cakes, it wasn't actually that much different. Except that I listened a lot, and didn't really talk much. Not exactly what I usually do-so much so, it was actually remarked on. Someone asked why I was so quiet, and I said it was because I didn't have anything to say. Always better to keep quiet in that case, I think. 

And on Thursday, I also did something a bit different. Instead of going to a prayer meeting, which I could have done, I spent time with a friend. Just chilling, chatting and watching a DVD. We watched 'Green Lantern', which isn't as bad as you may have heard; but almost certainly won't have a sequel. Anyway, we just had a nice, relaxing time. Which was great.

Friday was probably more relaxing. I say that because I can't actually remember doing anything that evening. At all. And that brings us to the weekend, which was pretty good, all in all. After work, a friend came round-this one female. You know, that's why the title's 'mainly' men. It was good to see her, as I haven't seen her properly for ages. She had about an hour or so spare in between the sessions at the Third Person conference. Which was apparently absolutely fantastic, and the podcasts are apparently just as powerful. I intend to check them out.
And after she had gone, I got picked up to go to a party. It was a friend's 30th, which he was sharing with another friend of his; so they'd hired a venue in Gloucester and invited loads of people. And there were certainly a good few people there. It was a great night, I think, celebrating with him, and catching up with some people I hadn't seen for quite some time. The place was all decorated out with Marvel themed wrapping paper and balloons-and he got given Marvel monopoly as a present. Not from me. I went for a simple option-chocolate. I couldn't think what to get him, so I decided to see if I could get 30 different chocolate bars. You know, what with him being 30 and all. Which is one thing I did do on Friday actually-go and look for them. I did manage it-sort of. I think there was a Wispa and a Wispa Gold, and a Mars and Mars Caramel. But I'm sure he didn't mind that.
And then on Sunday, I relaxed. Which is what I think is a very good weekend.

Out Of August, Into Autumn

Well, after the weekend, we had a bank holiday, and I spent most of that with friends. I went out for lunch with a few, and then went to buy a map with one of them. I then got to buy a book in Waterstones, which came as a bit of a surprise to me. I hadn't had that in mind, but clearly God had other ideas. On the Tuesday, I got a bit of a surprising text, telling me we were back on street teams that week, which was a week earlier than I was expecting. I don't remember anything much about the Wednesday, but on the Thursday, I decided I should go out with street teams; which turned out to be a really good idea. It appeared that they were unsure if they would be able to get people together to go out until October; but it turned out that the next two weeks were fine if they could get someone to collect the food from Soho. So I offered to do that.
And on the Friday, I was invited to a friend's housewarming party.Well, I'd actually been invited a couple of weeks before, but had forgotten when it was-I thought it was the Saturday. Thankfully, my housemate reminded me in time, and I wandered along. And that was a brilliant occasion. There were loads of people I knew there, not just Becky and Glen, who had invited me. People I hadn't seen for ages, and people I don't spend much time with. I even met a couple of new people, which is always good. there was plenty of laughter, conversation, and fun-and a general good time was had by all. And the thought of arranging to see some films with Dapo, at some point. That was my experience of it, anyway. May there be many more like that, as many as possible. And on the actual Saturday, it was back to work as usual, except, slightly unusually, Jess was back from maternity leave-sort of. Apparently, it is a legal requirement to offer something called 'keeping in touch days' so the new mum can continue to work a few days during the year. It was nice to have her back, anyway.

And then, the Sunday was the first of September, so technically also the first day of autumn. I had a very relaxing Sunday-a friend came round for a bit in the afternoon, and then I went to church in the evening. And again, a good time was had by all-that being my experience, anyway. The Monday was also relaxing, as I had that day off, which is unusual; but I had been asked to work my normal day off in the Gloucester shop. Which was fine, as a change is always interesting, and I did get a day off, being two days in a row. And Wednesday was a bit up in the air. I had been trying to sort out going round a friend's house with a couple of friends to watch a film, but that didn't happen, so I felt it was right to go to my cluster social after all. Which, again, was fun-this spending time with people appears to be quite good. I think I like it. And Thursday was memorable for a totally unexpected reason.
I was on the bus going home from working in Gloucester quite happily reading (the book I'd bought Bank Holiday Monday actually), when a girl got on the bus and sat beside me. Nothing unusual there, except for the fact that God said 'tell her she's beautiful'. You know, NOT the sort of thing you want to hear on a perfectly ordinary bus journey. Well, I sat there, at first trying to ignore it, and then arguing with God, trying to persuade Him that it really wasn't a good idea for me to do so; and then He said, 'also, tell her don't worry'. I had picked up that she was getting off the bus in Cheltenham, same as me; so I knew I had plenty of time, so I carried on trying to avoid it. Eventually, it got to a point where I said 'do I really have to?'; and He answered ' no, but if you don't, it's not you who'll miss out'. And I couldn't really argue with that; I just had to figure out how to do it. Well, as we were geting into town, she turned to me to ask me something about where the bus would stop, and I took the opportunity, and said 'you may think this is a bit weird, but...' I explained that I'm a Christian and God sometimes speaks to me, and He'd said 'don't worry' (that seemed the easier one to say). She smiled and thanked me, in quite a matter of fact way, so I got enough courage to say what He had said first-at which point, she smiled even more, if that were possible, and thanked me again. And said that she does often worry about all sorts of things. We chatted for a few minutes, and then the bus pulled up, so she got off the bus still smiling, and thanked me again. And that was that. To be honest, I was a bit exhausted, so I sat there for a few minutes before I pulled myself together and got off the bus-off to get the food for street teams.

So, I went out with street teams a bit later, which was still a bit quiet, and then later went to Hungry for God (a weekly prayer meeting). We got together to pray a one point about where we wanted the Kingdom of God to particularly break in, and I felt that one important thing was this blog. So we prayed about that.

A Great Greenbelt Weekend

So, at the last Seek His Face (next one coming up soon), the band were talking about going to Rivercamp, which is held over the August bank holiday-the same weekend as Greenbelt. So you might think that would be an easy decision for me, as anyone who knows me well knows I don't really like Greenbelt. (This isn't anything to do with Greenbelt itself, really, it's just that it feels too big for me to be really comfortable.) But Rivercamp, although not that far away, is just far enough that I would need a lift to be able to get there. However, I did feel that maybe, just maybe, I should make the effort to do so.

That's sort of by way of being a prologue. That thought, or something similar, continued to buzz round my head for the rest of the week. The main thing that was happening that week was a friend coming to stay the night before he went off to Greenbelt himself. Which was unfortunately a bit short -just one night- but it was great, as he doesn't live locally, and he'd just come back from travelling round New Zealand, so it was going to be good to catch up with him. So we sorted that out with my housemate, and figured out when he was going to get into Cheltenham, and I met him off the coach; ready for an evening's entertainment. We needed to get something to eat, as he'd just been travelling for about 5 hours (and there was no point in me getting food separately), so we went to a pub-where we ate, and then happily stayed for the next couple of hours.
We had a pint with our meals, and then decided to experiment a bit with the cocktail menu. By avoiding the pitchers, we had the possibility of trying quite a few more, including ones we hadn't tried before. Or for a while-like the red Aftershock, which used to be cinnamon and is now citrus. We bought a couple of rounds each, which I struggled with, not because I didn't have the money, but because my natural inclination is not to spend it -even on myself. But a while back, God spoke to me about being generous as a general way of living; and, though I'm still not good at it, I knew that I want to be. So I made the effort. And then we went home, where he met my housemate. And they immediately got into a long conversation. Which was good. And after that, we prayed. One of the things we prayed about was the buzzing thought that I should maybe go to Rivercamp. Or Greenbelt. Or something.

And so, the next day, off to work I went. Early in the morning for a change. And I met up with a friend after work. His last day home before going back to the army. And the Saturday was the same, as far as getting up early went. But I went out in the evening that time. I met up with a friend after work, and when I met her, I saw another friend who was only around for the day, purely by coincidence (maybe). And we ended up going to the cinema and seeing 'Kick-Ass 2'. Which was great-but quite different from the book. Which is hardly surprising, as I don't think they'd have been able to get a certificate if they'd filmed the book exactly. Sunday I ended up relaxing most of the day. Another friend phoned at some point and asked if I wanted to go to Greenbelt with him, but quite frankly, I was just too tired. I ended up going to church, which turned out to be fantastic. Apart from church itself being great, there were some friends of mine I hadn't seen for months-who also have been away recently. So, that was amazing. We caught up a bit, and chatted about going to Cwmbran, where they have been quite a few times recently. They said they'd be willing to give me a lift at some point when they go, so I look forward to that.

So, I ended up not doing anything out of the ordinary particularly that weekend, but I do think that thought was from God. Because of that, I thought about going to church or going somewhere else. It wasn't exactly as usual, as I hadn't actually been to my church for 3 or 4 weeks. The things that stuck in my mind about it are about being intentional, that often it doesn't matter what you do so much as actually choosing something. And also that relationships are important. Both of which I kind of knew/know, but that whole process really brought it home to me.